When my Baby Fever bulb started blinking, I saw possibilities everywhere. Wouldn't that mirror be adorable in a nursery? How cute is this stuffed animal? Don't you just love these alphabet flash cards?
I began collecting things mentally - and then physically - for my future child. A picture frame here. A sheet set there. One day at Target, I fell in love with a teal and green poster covered in cute little birds and flowers. I bought it without hesitation and it became the cornerstone of inspiration for the baby's room. The color of the walls and the shelf in the closet came from this poster. The birds became a theme - especially owls. (Now, I want to clarify that I was into owls before owls became super popular. If you know me at all, you know I do not do anything simply because it is popular. I'm actually kind of irritated they suddenly exploded into the mainstream, but I'll get over it.)
Once I became pregnant, I really ran with the owl theme. I registered for an owl changing pad cover. I bought adorable owl pillows. My friend Monica bought me a tiny owl shaped chalkboard, which I hung in the nursery and wrote on it "Whooo's going to be here soon?". Owls kind of became Kenley's token animal. When I saw one out and about, I'd think of her and how I was so looking forward to meeting her and showing her the beautiful room I'd created just for her.
Now that she's gone, owls have become MY token animal. You'd think that seeing an owl right now would be painful - a terrible trigger for a tragic time. But, it's not. When I see one, I see her. I am reminded of her kicking and playing happily inside me. I am reminded of the excitement I felt getting ready for her arrival. I think about all the joyous parts of my pregnancy. When I see an owl, I think of my beautiful and wonderful little girl who had to fly away, but who I still love - and who still loves me.
Today, a dear friend took me out to lunch. After lunch, we walked around a few antique shops. This is what greeted me in one.
Well, hello there, baby girl! It's nice to see you again! Mama wants you to know that Owl always love you!