Not a day goes by that I do not think of holding my little girl. Not a minute passes that my fingers do not remember the softness of her skin, that my arms do not remember the weight of her tiny body. For that brief moment in my life when I held her, still and cold, I felt not just the heart wrenching pain of loss, but also the soul lifting sense of completeness. I didn't even know I was missing anything until she was right in front of me. This is what life is all about. This right here, in my arms. I loved her while she was on the inside, that's for sure, but there was something that clicked into place once I saw her, once I held her, that made me know, without a doubt, that this was the purest and strongest love in existence. That love poured out of me like water from a fire hydrant, free and powerful. It's the power of that love that fuels the pain I feel now. We all know from our own experience, the more we love, the more it hurts when we lose the one we love. Whether a 7th grade crush, a cherished pet, a broken engagement, or an angel child - the greater the climb, the harder the fall. I climbed to the highest mountain and fell to the deepest canyon. But, I wouldn't trade the depth of this fall for a less amount of love. I am grateful for that love. I am grateful I was able to experience such a true emotion. I am grateful for her presence in my life - even if it was for such a short amount of time. She made me understand what it means to be completely and utterly selfless. She made me feel the greatest joy, and although the result of that was the greatest sorrow, I am not sorry. She made me a mother. No one can take that away from me. I am her mother. I will always be her mother, and she will always be my daughter. I created a life so wonderful and so grand that the world could not contain it. And I will always, always, always love her with everything I have - from now until the day my breath leaves my body for the last time. And, even then, I'm sure I'll still find a way.