Wednesday, February 15, 2017

Run Kenley Run Playlist #7: Titanium

The only way to survive a lifetime of grief is to eventually become stronger than it.  When you first begin putting yourself back together after the initial shock wave has demolished you, your pieces are weak.   They easily re-shatter.  You feel like you are in a constant state of breaking apart and reassembly - like a repeating loop of a car detonation - exploding out and coming back together over and over and over.  

Eventually, after what seems like a million lifetimes of breaking apart and piecing yourself back together, you manage to stay adhered for longer and longer.  You still shatter every now and then.  You still break apart, but you become defiant about it.   You look grief in it's ugly, little face and you tell it you won't let it beat you.  No matter how many times it tries to tear you down, you will always put yourself back together.  You will always get back up.  You will always keep fighting.  

I'm bulletproof, nothing to lose
Fire away, fire away
Ricochet, you take your aim
Fire away, fire away
You shoot me down but I won't fall
I am titanium
You shoot me down but I won't fall
I am titanium

For me, this song is a big F You to grief.   Shoot at me.  Break me down.  Slice me open.  Do your worst.   I'm not going to let you win.   I have allowed myself to be beaten for far too long and I am done.  I know I will always hurt.  I will always miss my Ninja fiercely.   But I am not going to give in to that hopelessness that keeps me broken.   I will continue to put myself back together.  I will continue to walk through the fire.  Day after day after day.

Being weak has made me strong.   I am titanium.  



  






You shout it out,
But I can't hear a word you say
I'm talking loud, not saying much
I'm criticized but all your bullets ricochet
Shoot me down, but I get up

I'm bulletproof, nothing to lose
Fire away, fire away
Ricochet, you take your aim
Fire away, fire away
You shoot me down but I won't fall
I am titanium
You shoot me down but I won't fall
I am titanium

Cut me down
But it's you who'll have further to fall
Ghost town and haunted love
Raise your voice, sticks and stones may break my bones
I'm talking loud not saying much

I'm bulletproof, nothing to lose
Fire away, fire away
Ricochet, you take your aim
Fire away, fire away
You shoot me down but I won't fall
I am titanium
You shoot me down but I won't fall
I am titanium
I am titanium
I am titanium

Stone-heart, machine gun
Firing at the ones who run
Stone heart loves bulletproof glass

You shoot me down but I won't fall
I am titanium
You shoot me down but I won't fall
I am titanium
You shoot me down but I won't fall
I am titanium
You shoot me down but I won't fall
I am titanium

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